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2004.05.28

Comments

NotEnnis

do they use "bengali" interchangably for "bangladeshi" at the beeb?

Not sure, but East London is generally Bangladeshi.

i'm often accused of a ridiculous affinity for punjab and all things that originated in it... but my DNA is practically coded with bong-love.

You're drawn to passionate cultures. Try "Devdas" (subtitled version), Italy and Spain :)

Mimosa

Ah, girl (think "Girl" by Beatles): such is the tragedy of parents who feel too much for their children. Or maybe not.

I just had another one of those phone matches with my dear mother. Though I've internalized all the expectations and harbor enough guilt, so much that it won't cut through, like the rice stuck to the bottom of the rice cooker, for my American jeans and American mouth and American mind: it's not enough.

Once again, she went back to a suitable boy. Suman, a prince of a man, a medical man, a dutiful man, and also, a man who cannot stir my mind and feed my endless ruminating. We met through family friends with wonderful intentions three years ago and I regretted the interlude ever since. I had carefully wrapped a powder blue silk sari and made up my face. Drank tea and conversed with the wit and charm of a suitable girl. Yet staring at his expectant face, watching his eager parents, something snapped in my pleasing ways, and I longed to rip off my sari and go back to my jeans and t-shirt and Pumas. Still single, my mother gets update on said Suman, as if he rents storage space in his brain for a delicately rendered image of me. Fat chance. Without tact, I say to my mother: "You can't expect anything from me. Know that I'm your daughter and that I love you and that's all. And if you truly understand me, then you know that this man will slowly, sweetly eat my soul."

Next to my laptop sits a silver framed black and white: my mother, 24, fresh, serene, hopeful, anxious, garbed in a simple house sari. In another month, my father would fly out alone to the American continent for what was supposed to be a temporary stay. Then there's me, age six months, perched on her arm. I'm wearing a pale dress with black accents and embroidered flowers, made by my aunt. And a Mona Lisa smile. To this day, I wonder what I thought when my father snapped the shutter in the tepid breeze. The banks of the Ganges faced us. Behind us, the small town of Sahibganj (town of white men), Bihar. I imagine the scent of burning wood, incense, cow dung, and jasmine in the air. I picture my father trying to archive each precious moment, and eager first-time father wondering what this precious Mimosa would yield.

Such parents do mean well. Even when they wrench the worst guilt from my rice-fed belly, the one that will never be smooth and taut in low-rider jeans.

Mimosa

Ah, girl (think "Girl" by Beatles): such is the tragedy of parents who feel too much for their children. Or maybe not.

I just had another one of those phone matches with my dear mother. Though I've internalized all the expectations and harbor enough guilt, so much that it won't cut through, like the rice stuck to the bottom of the rice cooker, for my American jeans and American mouth and American mind: it's not enough.

Once again, she went back to a suitable boy. Suman, a prince of a man, a medical man, a dutiful man, and also, a man who cannot stir my mind and feed my endless ruminating. We met through family friends with wonderful intentions three years ago and I regretted the interlude ever since. I had carefully wrapped a powder blue silk sari and made up my face. Drank tea and conversed with the wit and charm of a suitable girl. Yet staring at his expectant face, watching his eager parents, something snapped in my pleasing ways, and I longed to rip off my sari and go back to my jeans and t-shirt and Pumas. Still single, my mother gets update on said Suman, as if he rents storage space in his brain for a delicately rendered image of me. Fat chance. Without tact, I say to my mother: "You can't expect anything from me. Know that I'm your daughter and that I love you and that's all. And if you truly understand me, then you know that this man will slowly, sweetly eat my soul."

Next to my laptop sits a silver framed black and white: my mother, 24, fresh, serene, hopeful, anxious, garbed in a simple house sari. In another month, my father would fly out alone to the American continent for what was supposed to be a temporary stay. Then there's me, age six months, perched on her arm. I'm wearing a pale dress with black accents and embroidered flowers, made by my aunt. And a Mona Lisa smile. To this day, I wonder what I thought when my father snapped the shutter in the tepid breeze. The banks of the Ganges faced us. Behind us, the small town of Sahibganj (town of white men), Bihar. I imagine the scent of burning wood, incense, cow dung, and jasmine in the air. I picture my father trying to archive each precious moment, and eager first-time father wondering what this precious Mimosa would yield.

Such parents do mean well. Even when they wrench the worst guilt from my rice-fed belly, the one that will never be smooth and taut in low-rider jeans.

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