oh my.

Date:	Sunday, March 27, 2005 5:13:00 AM
Subject:	hi
Message:	hi hows the easter weekend going? saw your profile as i was talking to a friend and having had some bad experiences with women who have taken me for a ride i have thought twice about writing to you but i didnt want to judge u with them and so il say what i wanted to say which is you look very beautiful and i hope the outer beauty comes from deep inside anyway, wld be nice to get to know you more x

:+:

sigh.  this affected me more than the typical friendster message does.   but why?

why the discomfort?  why is my tummy in a teensy bit of a knot?  if i had to quiet myself and pay attention to what i am feeling, what churns inside is pity, sympathy, unease...and the kalamata olive bread i ate with spinach feta dip. 

eeek.

i'm just weirded out and i don't quite know why. this prickly sensation makes no sense when one considers that i've been getting Fster messages for almost two years now, so this isn't the first attempt at "getting to know" me that i've experienced.  i keep thinking i should be used to this.  then again, there's something extra blue about this though, i feel it.  a broken heart calls out from those carefully chosen words.  THAT's not common. 

i see that this guy joined just this month...maybe that's why his message reads the way it does.  here's hoping he figures out how it all works, i.e. leading with baggage isn't the best strategery for this sort of thing.  then again, that goes for more than Fster, innit?  i hope he finds the one who's meant for him.

Comments

[Cherian]

Ten bucks says it was the all Greek meal. Still, you could single-handedly bridge the trans-Atlantic rift! Seriously though, I think you're missing the not-so-subtle nuance in the message. Perhaps a boy's perspective would be of assistance. The message reads like this: "if you're a nice person, you won't be a cheeky wanker and ignore me. Prove to me that you're different from 'other' women."

I'll bet all the money in my pockets against all the money in your pockets that you sent him a nice little note similar to what you posted here. Mind you, I wouldn't characterize your uber-kindness pejoratively just yet. You're slightly right though, I do feel a little bit bad for him but isn't it a little mean to post his friendster profile and pic up so we can all look him up? Whatev...he's skeevy.

P.S. Just in case, I emptied my pockets ;o)
P.P.S. I <3 your online empire!

[deepa]

I'm w/C's interpretation. The line that stands out is the bit about women having taken him for a ride. Ummmm....he's writing YOU!?! It smacks of the gauntlet thrown down: "now you have to write me back and be nice to me."

-D

[parashu playing god]

have stopped thinking- kissing in the air- cheek to cheek, is silly. In certain societies, urban and wannabe urban (far away from small towns in kottayam), communication has evolved: reading between lines, complex stroking rituals, employing TA, PA, NLP to reach orgasm... Proof that we are still animals, we still follow rituals of gene selection and mating.
Some more equal. thank you orwell saar. end.

prelude:
Stephan's letter- Annas reply- Anna posting it in public- Stephan's shame- Annas pink highlighter- Cherians analysis-My sympathy for Stephan- My empathy for Stephan- Feeling of been; there done that- Smirk on my face- Anna is learning- Stephan is learning- Cherian is learning- I am learning- We moaned and died once more our 'little deaths' (we all will find our happiness, stepan too)

[A N N A]

actually, i haven't written him back.

i usually don't write stranger-friendsters back. this is SOP for a plethora of reasons, the greatest of which is this: when i don't have the time to write my own cousins, friends, faithful readers or actual friendsters...writing randoms isn't an option.

this is my diary, i'll vent my spleen, head and ass HERE, but actually writing back...well, cherian was wrong and right. i did not post a link to his profile, nor is his picture more than a thumbnail...but yes, he is skeevy. so, um no. i wasn't trying to tar and feather him for writing. just expressing the maelstrom within that was caused by him doing so. again, this is MY DIARY.

finally, as deepa so concisely laid out, the gauntlet-throwing was a bit off-putting. we all have suffered, and he's quite kind to not judge me b/c of his previous pain, but leading a "hello" with it is somewhat inappropriate, IMHO.

[Cherian]

Hey kid, I'm really sorry if my comment came off as a rebuke. That was not my intention. Perhaps it was unintentional but the HTML links on the name and picture are partially from Friendster so I was able to look up his profile and that's what enabled me to make the trans-Atlantic "joke." That might be the most nerdiness written in one sentence.

Anyway, of course it is your diary and you can write about whatever you damn well please. I had hoped that was clear from the <3-ing of your empire. So vent away, girl. The spleen and the ass would be particularly interesting. I'm trying to envision a post entitled, "a day in the life of my spleen" or "what my ass would say if it talked." I'll wait with bated breath.

Your SOP for dealing with "randoms" makes total sense. I just know that I always feel bad not responding to randoms and mine don't even contain this kind of passive-aggressive strategy. Inappropriateness aside, it's funny for all of us readers. Nonetheless, I'm glad I emptied my pockets. Good times...

[Cherian]

And you did LD, how great is that?

[A N N A]

awww Cherian, i loved the <3 and everything else you wrote! :) no worries, seriously.

i only wrote that comment b/c things on my diary's comment threads have a way of spiraling out of control and before i know it, i'm being pilloried for being such a heinous bitch blah blah blah.

thanks for pointing out that my cut-n-paste job unintentionally included the poor guy's fster ID number...i didn't realise. also, i would've done just what you did, so i respect your sleuthing.

and yes, i looooved LD. 12-0 my senior year. ;)

hope you become a regular-- if you do, i'll see what i can do about the spleen and ass venting. ;) ;) ;)

[Mike]

What we have is the Brit version of a wimpster. He wants you to email him out of pity and guilt. Sadly both were surgically removed by a team from Mount Sinai.

[Cherian]

Being a regular is part of my daily lexicon! I'm anticipating the throwbacks to my anatomy/physiology classes as well. ;) That was quite the impressive LD career. I don't know anyone else who can claim the undefeated season!

[Fava]

Anna,

Have you gained weight recently? You look fat in your pictures now. I saw you posted something about that recently, but you said only 7 pounds. Thats a lie right? I mean, of course it is. Its at least 14 pounds. (You have to figure Anna is not going to tell the truth anyway.)

[Rachna Kurien]

The theory of being Indian is to be fat to separate the rich from poor. Its a tradition not to mess around with so its okay to be fat and ugly. I learned that and most of all, men loves women with plenty of flesh to bang around rather than a skinny one!
Rachna

[Nik]

Are you kidding me? Mallu girls are this ignorant and disrespectful? Your parents really haven't taught you to be nice to others? You have nothing better to do with yourselves?